Thursday, June 28, 2007

I Love U Guys Stuff

My beautiful daughter Dalerie just read me all the comments, and I am so touched. Everything went fine...Although I am still trying to fart so that I can go home(wish you were here smile). I love you guys!!

Monday, June 25, 2007

Medical Stuff

The answer to last week's movie quiz is Snatch. If you haven't seen it, get to steppin' and rent the DVD immesdiately.


I'll be out of here for 4 - 6 weeks folks. I'm having "use it or lose it" surgery, otherwise known as a hysterectomy tomorrow. I don't have the 'net at home so I won't be able to visit with you guys until I come back to work.

Please KNOW that I love you guys!

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Movie Quote Quiz Stuff

All the quotes below are from my new favorite film of all time. The dialogue is so well written and performed that I'm going to watch it again tonight. Do you guys know this outstanding movie?

(Hint: the director of the film uses one of his wife's musical hit's during a long scene involving a neck and a window.)

(Hint: The star of the film also appeared in a film where adrenelin was very important)

"Why the *beep* do I want a caravan thats got no *beep* wheels!?"

"For protection against what? Zee Germans?"

"Would you like to claim anything?"
"Yea. Don't go to England."

"You been using dog *beep* for toothpaste, Mullet?"

"I *beep* hate pikeys!"

'what do you mean look inside the dog, he aint a tin of baked beans is he??'

"You mean Boris the Blade... Boris the Bulletdodger?"
"Yea"
"Why do they call him the Bulletdodger?"
"Because he dodges bullets, Avi."

"The fact that you've got "REPLICA" written down the side of your gun, and the fact that I've got "DESERT EAGLE .50" written down the side mine, should precipitate your balls into shrinking, along with your presence."


BIG HINT BELOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This should make it easy!



Monday, June 18, 2007

Weekend Stuff

Oh, the exciting life I live!

I think most people look forward to the weekend so that they can attend fabulous parties, do cool stuff I've never heard of, and generally just have a ball beginning Friday night and lasting until the late hours on Sunday.

I, on the other hand, leave work on Friday evening smiling, ever hopeful that I'll be a part of the weekend fun, but knowing that since I have nothing planned, the chances for excitement are slim to none.

Slim to none. Damn.

I imagine myself a party chick, a fun person - maybe even one of the cool kids.

Nope.

On Friday, immediately after work, I went to the first meeting of the Science Fiction Book Club that I started. There were five of us there discussing the book, Starship Troopers, by Robert Heinlein. We talked for about two hours and parted, secure that every single point made in the novel was discussed repeatedly from every angle. I only drank sweet tea (unlike others and you know who you are!) so I can't blame gin for my geekiness this time. I guess I just love gatherings like this with other sci-fi lovers. (Anyone is welcome to join - send me an email.)

After an exciting ride home on public transportation I began my Friday evening ritual: I turned on the TV and watched crap until Adrian got home from work and took over posession of the remote so that he could righteously take over the control of the crap we watched until I went to bed.

Saturday morning held the promise of possible excitement and I suppose fighting for a dryer at the laundromat might be considered excitement by some. I get pissed when people wash their clothing elsewhere, and try to grab up all the dryers so that we suckers with clothes in the wash get stuck waiting in the non airconditioned space for a lot longer than needed. I'll admit it: I'm a snitch sometimes. I asked the attendendant to limit the dryers the "washed my shit elsewhere" lady could use and she was pissed with me. Pissed probably doesn't really cover it. The young chippie threw me a few looks of death and mumbled under her breath, but I stood firm in my righteousness and used the very dryer she had her cold little heart set on. Ha!

After all the excitement (cue crickets) it was time to take my 15 year old son to get his weekly braids. He uses a different hairstylist or salon every week, so I never know where we need to go and how much the braids will cost me. He likes to surprise his old mom, not with gifts, but with situations. He was the kid who would tell me in the car, on the way to school that he needed exactly $3.27 (no checks) in a legal envelope that very morning so that he could go on the trip with his class, "it's the last day, Mommy!".

This week, my wonderful (dripping with sarcasm) ex-husband decided to put his spin on things so that I learned AFTER I drove to his house and waited in the Atlanta heat and humidity for days it seemed, that in celebration of Father's Day, he would be taking our child to the hairdresser although my participation in payment was still required. He'd call me later to let me know.

Hot and annoyed I decided to stop for gas on the way home. There were lines since the price for regular was only $2.89. I finally made it close to a pump - the guy in front of me had a mid-sized car, so I didn't anticipate a long wait.

Wrong!

Dude decided to wash his windows with the convenient squeegie and the free inky water (that's NEVER changed) at the side of the pump. Usually it's cool, since it takes time to fill up a tank. The only problem was that dude wasn't gassing up. He was window washing. Yup - On one of the hottest, sweatiest days of the year, this fine young cannibal decides to wash his windows KNOWING that there was a long line of hot and sweaty people waiting to buy gas.

Once he finished his car hygeine he begins his STROLL to the convenience store and cash register.

After a wait that seemed like forever, he finally returned to his car (that I was beginning to think he abandoned) with a 64 ounce fountain soda and what looked like nachos. He spend a ridiculous amount of time placing his food and drink in the car then sidled over to the actual pump and finally started filling his tank.

As he pulled out I beeped my horn and stuck out my tongue. He pulled around the pump area and into a regular parking space in front of the store. He strolled back over to me and asked, truly mystified, why I stuck out my tongue. Clueless isn't just a movie.

I explained that watching the car wash ritual and then waiting for someone in the brutal Georgia heat wasn't as much fun as it sounded.

He was truly apologetic and offered to take me out as a peace offering. Since he was humble, cute and available...








Did you guys think I'd go out with a selfish dude like that? (those of you who are saying, "begger can't be choosers", need to quit!)

Of course I declined. For someone with no other offers on the horizon, I just may have blown a good thing, but insensitivity and lack of empathy aren't really that high on my list of qualities in a man.

I was pleasantly surprised that the braids were a mere $25 this week and that my son was actually ready to leave for home by the time I arrived. Since it was "defer to him, shut up and just be nice" weekend (Father's Day) I dropped Jack off with his dad and went on to explore bigger and better things.

(Adrian left the house early that morning to help a co-worker with his fledging landscaping business. This guy worked every Saturday for a couple of hours and needed a
little extra help
and offered Adrian $60 or $70 to go with him. He neglected to share some pretty pertinent information with Adrian. He was doing a new Senior's complex and anticipated the work to last the whole day. $60 to work in the sweltering heat for a whole day isn't cool.)

I had an afternoon of unlimited opportunities ahead of me so I went home and watched more crap on TV.

I sent Adrian encouraging texts during commercials like "don't be a doo-doo head" and "I forbid you to sweat" to help his torturous ordeal pass more quickly. (He calls me annoying for very legitimate reasons).

Adrian has a very light complexion, and was a brighter red than "Larry the Lobster" when he got home that night. Adrian was pissed and we spent most of the evening cursing the demon that spawned his coworker who paid Adrian a measly $70 for more than 12 hours of hard labor in the hot sun.

Following that special brand of excitement I went to bed and slept restlessly until my Tylenol PMs kicked in. I take the Tylenol so that my bad dreams last quite a bit longer than necessary.

Sunday was so eventful that the day passed by in a blur. Grocery shopping and hair washing were the main two fun activites of the day.

Last night as a special treat, A and I went to Blockbuster to return tapes and pick up a few. Of course none of the recent releases were available, so we picked the best of the worst (after Adrian checked EVERY SINGLE FUCKING TITLE in the store).

We watched the beginning of a truly awful film and decided to just quit and go to bed.

How was your weekend?

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Bloggity Blog Hater Stuff

It always amazes me that most of the people I know in RL don't read blogs at all. I send out links to wonderful pages and great information by outstanding writers, but they're just not interested. I'm surprised by the number of people who have never heard the term "blog" before and who ask me exactly what's the point. I generally go into the shortened "from the word 'weblog' " explanation and give them a quickie on some of the types of pages I've seen - I've offered links to different blog hosting services and waited for the announcement that there's a new kid on the block out there.

I've watched people's eyes kind of glaze over sometimes when I'm discussing blogging, and I realize that this phenomenon just isn't for everyone. (My head realizes it - but my heart still doesn't get it).

I've been warned not to give up too much info about the wonder that is jali - if I do, the "internet stalkers" will get me. I've been told that my online family members are actually nuts who type with one desperate hand while naked and masterbating and that it's impossible to make real friends online.

I've met some of you guys - and you're as perverted as me - and I loves ya.

Are your RL friends and family members bloggers? If not are they supporters?

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Sexy Stuff

Justin didn't have to bring sexy back. Sexy's been here for a while!



Monday, June 11, 2007

Bunch 'O Stuff

Are you in the mood for some rambling on and on, with no real main point?

Here ya go:
I'm a walking, talking (well sometime mumbling) racial stereotype - so I've been told by unnamed family menbers. I love fried chicken and watermelon is my favorite fruit. I'm an embarrassment to some. (sidetrack" I hate the words "embarrasado" and "hysteria" because of they seem to imply that pregnancy is an embarrassment and that hysteria is a women's thing) back to our story

I have family members that don't want me to order these delicious treats when out in public. They want to keep my behavior a secret. These family members would probably try to "pass" if they were a little lighter in complexion and anything that points to "non-mainstream" as one cousin calls it is taboo to them. (sellouts!!!)

These are the same family members who looked at me in disgust when I first started loc'ing my hair and my head was covered in the little baby nubs. (you cut all processed or relaxed hair off so that your hair will loc and the new growth is twisted into little baby dreads which I call nubs). One relative started calling me "Whoopie" (for Ms. Goldberg) - another asked if I were a gay radical since I "wanted to look like one". Yet another would hum the "Roots" theme music when I'd walk into a room. These are college educated people with ingrained self hatred I suppose.

I didn't realize how closed minded my own family could be - or how much some of them judge a persons's worth by their appearance.

I can be cruel sometimes, so if I find myself out and about with one of these pretentious biddies, I'll always be sure to order my chicken fried and my watermelon cool. The horrified looks on their faces is always worth it.

I don't dislike Paris Hilton. If paparazzi followed me 24/7, I'll bet they'd find some dirt to publish. I don't run around "commando" style (except possibly on laundry day) so there wouldn't be interesting snatch photos, but I'm not as sweet as I used to be. (can anyone name the movie the bold face quote is taken from?) and I'd probably be caught doing something embarrassing.

It's true that Paris has been a bit of a media hound, but I think that it's gotten way out of her control. I didn't laugh when she was sent back to jail last week. I tried to imagine the feeling of being confined even just for a week and I hope she's okay. (I just got stopped for tags and could have gone to jail myself - the officer was pretty cool in just writing me a ticket.) If her mother had given her more than just an appreciation for material things then she may not be in this situation. If I can have empathy for others without home training, then I can feel concerned for Paris Hilton too.

Confession time:
I've been watching quite a bit of Far from reality TV. I'm fascinated by the girls in "Charm School". Fascinated. No one I know speaks the way they do, dresses like them or fights so easily. It's like watching a National Geographic special on hyenas or tarantulas - they're ugly but interesting.

I've also been watching the "Real World Reunion" of the Las Vegas group. Oh. My. God. (this time TV character quote). The two black chicks, Alyssa and Aryanne (however you spell it) are such dramatic little twerps. They're either crying, shouting or doing that black girl neck thing. I can't seem to look away.

Saddest confession - I watch "My Sweet Sixteen" in horror, but I keep tuning in. Total lack of class or kindness and these are children. The parents (loosely using term) are idiots with too much money.

In the last month or two I've also watched Australia's Next Top Model, America's Next Top Model, American Idol, So You Think You Can Dance, and Top Chef.

I think I need to step away from the television.

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Game Stuff (Must be a TV person from the 80's and 90's)

Match the characters to their partners. Then Name their shows.

Thomas S. Magnum
Mel Sharples
Sonny Crockett
Heathcliff Huxtable
Kate McArdle
David Addison
Insp. Steve Keller
Laura Holt
Carol Kester Bondurant
Dr. Robert Hartley
Felix Unger
Jonathan Quayle Higgins
Oscar Madison
Alice Hyatt
Rico Tubbs
Lt. Mike Stone
Remington Steele
Clair Huxtable
Allison Lowell
Maddie Hayes

SPOILER BELOW SPOILER BELOW SPOILER BELOW SPOILER BELOW SPOILER BELOW SPOILER BELOW


answers:

Thomas S. Magnum and Jonathan Quayle Higgins - Magnum P.I.

Mel Sharples and Alice Hyatt - Alice

Sonny Crockett and Rico Tubbs - Miami Vice

Heathcliff Huxtable and Clair Huxtable - The Bill Cosby Show

Kate McArdle and Allison Lowell - Kate and Allie

David Addison and Maddie Hayes - Moonlighting

Insp. Steve Keller and Lt. Mike Stone - The Streets of San Francisco

Laura Holt and Remington Steele - Remington Steele

Carol Bondurant and Dr. Robert Hartley - The Bob Newhart Show (original version)

Felix Unger and Oscar Madison - The Odd Couple

Blog of The Week Stuff

http://problemchildbride.com/blog

Go to this weblog.

Read it.

Laugh.

Rinse.

Repeat daily.



She's Scottish (think Trainspotting but no heroin) so take your time reading. Have a ball reading the archives. Share her with your friends.

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

She's Out! Stuff

She's gone. Out. Done. Over. Through. Flunked. Expelled.

'Bout time!!!!


Monday, June 04, 2007

Movie Stuff

I spent part of the weekend watching rentals from Blockbuster. I'm doing another unsolicited review.

Paycheck was a movie I don't remember adding to my Blockbuster queue and I reluctantly sat down to watch it. When the beginning credits listed Ben Afleck as the star, I almost turned it off (despite his lovely face and physique - he's sexy as hell to me, but he doesn't seem to usually pick movies I like - except for his Kevin Smith appearances - Chasing Amy is a great movie IMHO)but decided to give it a few minutes - I'm glad I did. Sci-Fi!!!!!

I love Sci-Fi and any movie based on a Phillip Dick story is worth watching. In Paycheck, Ben Afleck's character Michael Jennings is an engineer who works on secret or classified projects then has his memory erased for that period of time. We watch the erasure process - dangerous - but worth it to him. The jobs generally last for less than 3 months.

His buddy James offers him a job that's expected to take 3 years and convinces him that the big ($90,000,000) paycheck will be worth it.

I don't like spoilers so you have to rent it to get to the meat. I thought it was good.

Alpha Dog on the other hand could have been called "F'd up people behaving badly". The acting was decent - in some cases excellent, but the (true) story was appalling. It's difficult for me to imagine young men and women really doing all the things the film shows us. The message I got was parents with money lack parenting skills. (I thought Justin Timberlake was great - I just hated the movie) Quote from Adrian: "That was foul."

Slingshot stars David Arquette and Balthazar Getty. This is the convoluted film from hell. I have nothing else to say.

I just took a look at my Blockbuster queue and saw that Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow was another film I watched (well tried to watch) this weekend. Despite the sci-fi I could not watch this boring (boring like the Superman TV show from the 50's boring) movie for more than 20 minutes. Do not rent this unless you're having trouble sleeping or you want to punish someone. Yawn.