Thursday, December 07, 2006

TV Stuff

Seems as though ranting is my thing.

I'll start with the local news today. I'm sick and tired of the newscasters taunting the poor weatherperson because they don't like the forecast.

"Jim, I wanted to play golf today and all you can tell me is that it's going to rain. C'mon and bring us some sun." (laughter in the background audible since this is obviously soooo hilarious)

I would love to see the tables turned just once!

The newscaster finishes his report about a string of robberies and shootings in the downtown area. The weatherperson has something to say.

"Bill, I wanted to walk downtown safely today and all you can report is crime. Enough with the murders! C'mon, bring us some better news." (cue laughter of the crew)

I'm sick of the "only on 11-Alive" stories. If it's really news then all the major stations will carry it by 11pm. Your "exclusive" regarding the high price of haircuts for kiddies this fall isn't necessary.

I'm tired of the false camraderie of the "news team". The promos for the news (strange concept when you think about it) indicate that the team lives, works and plays together. They pose these days like the actors of the WB did back in the day (here I go with that worn out phrase again) with either the serious newscaster look or the sappy smile frozen on their heavily made up faces.

I feel as though the actual news is much more important than the personalities involved and that I can do without a profile of the sports guy. It's nice that he has children, but his family isn't news. Giving us 3 minutes of his kid playing Pop Warner football is wasted filler.

I really dislike the news people going over the top about the local sports teams as though they didn't go over the top in the other market they just transferred from. I think it's okay to report news from Atlanta and still be loyal to YOUR sports team. I think it's okay to report news from Atlanta and NEVER share your personal likes and dislikes with the public. I just want the news.

I can't imagine making Channel 9's website my homepage. I'm told I could have "up to the minute" weather and traffic reports if I do it. Instead I look out my window for rain. No rain then I assume I'll stay dry. I'm in Atlanta. I KNOW the traffic is going to suck. I can figure out the degree of suckage based on the time of day or the season of the year.

Rubbing hands together in that sexy villianous way. Who will be my next target? Hmmmm.


/t. said...

& slackbutts beware

jali has found her calling and is on a roll -- she is as merciless as she is unrelenting -- you are warned

tv news, yeah, somewhere, somehow, someone (probably a harvard mba) figured out that sheep need more entertainment and less news

hey, wait a minute... that's why i come to this blog...



Dirk_Star said...

LOL!! So true.

Cough... Cough...

I'm a little under the weather today.

Lunch with an ebony goddess like yourself and you want me to bring the wife?

Man, sometimes this marriage thing bums me out.

dirk.mancuso said...

Dirk(in best announcer voice): And the bitch ball is in Jali's court...she runs with...look at those moves...she shoots...SHE SCORES!!!! Back over to you Bill...

***big hug***

I'm so glad you're back -- the last few days have been a riot!

Matt said...

Well, Anchorman with Will Ferrell really said it all....

The cheesy egos are just amazing.... It is something to see one of these folks in person.

(I hope I am not Satan!)

mist1 said...

You mean the Team doesn't live together? Oh, I am crushed. I have all these images of them slapping Monica Kaufman on the a$$ before she goes on air.

Superstar said...

LOL ;o)
This is funny...I never really thought about it...
Then again I really don't watch the news. The fake-i-ness drives me bonkers, especially when they are talking about kids that get killed and ~heart breaking here~ I just cant sit thru an 1/2 hour anymore....

C said...

The world is full of a mass army of captains obvious.

Tired Dad said...

I do not watch television. At all.

This, apparently, makes me some sort of freak.

I shall not claim my life is any better as a result, but I know it is not worse.

Give it a try for a week. I double dare you.

Luke Cage said...

Miss Jali, you can rant about me. I'll be a sista's target. I've got all kinds of issues going on. You won't see an end in sight (wink)

Fairmaiden327 said...

Babe, consider this an invitation to write on my site for next Friday's Feature: Asshole of The Week. If interested email me at Gmail. Much love.

jali said...

I enjoy your page - I'm glad the strength of Satan's word brought you here. Word of caution: smart alecks will be punished.

dirk s.,
Ebony Goddess? Maybe wifie CAN stay home...

dirk (mamma mancuso's baby boy aka pup),
I really missed you! Please see your page for the Jali lecture.

I have to rent Anchorman to see what you're talking about. I haven't seen Elf either. Am I the only one?

tired d.,
I don't think the non-tv thing makes you a freak - OTHER activities might...

Based on recent hairdos, I think someone's slapping her in the head.

I hate the seques from the sad news to the bull.

You are soooo right.

I got nuttin' but love for you babee...(name the artist)

I'll send you mail. How's "skinny"?

/t. said...

uh oh...


(The Monkees or Heavy D & The Boyz)


Webmiztris said...

lmao! the idea of the weatherman turning the tables on the anchorman cracked me up...

awaiting said...

Okay, pair all of those with a super suped up exaggerated, barely audible southern accent and you have the tragedy that is the Mississippi News.

I'm left at the end of each newscast wondering just how in the hell they got a job on tv.

Come on now, seriously, how professional is it to say, "Ya'll might wanna put on ya'lls coats, tomorrow is gonna be one heck of a record breaker!"

Tjotjog said...

I like it when you get all worked up. It is a beautiful thing.

Luke Cage said...

Da Five Heartbeats...! I love that movie miss Jali..

Enemy of the Republic said...

Found you on Satan's blog--good one with the credit card. I share your dislike of the television news. I can't even watch it anymore.

Dirk_Star said...

Just wanted to stop by and say hello to my favorite mocha vision.

How is your weekend?

jali said...

Ding, ding, ding, ding!

I would love to really see it happen.

"the tragendy that is Mississippi News" is hilarious!

Keep watching.... (smile) Thanks for the visit.

Me too! Is there a heart... is there a heart in the house tonight?

Hi co-minion of the evil one. How are you?

Weekend was great, thanks. I'm enjoying all these lovely words, dude! "Mocha vision" made my day.

Kav said...

I rarely listen to the news anyway, the bastards just piss me off. Linzi can't understand that when I want the news I just log on to t'internet.

jali said...

Hooray! kav is back! Welcome.

Kav said...

tyvm. It's been difficult to stay away.

hot coffee girl said...

"Back in the day"?! You are not old enough to be saying that yet. :-)

Anonymous said...

i thought you didnt watch TV ;(