(for Mike fans:"neener")
Why do I regularly find myself running into people who know me who I can't remember at all? Then I have to spend the rest of the day trying to figure out the who, what, when, where and especially the why of the relationship with this stranger who greeted me so warmly. (Now shut up! It's not always alcohol related - I am not a drunk!)
I do the fake, "how are YOU?" and smile while my brain is sorting through the possibilities. I usually ask, "how is everyone?" (trying for a clue) still smiling like I know who the hell they are.
Sometimes they give it away, but most of the time the response is, "Fine." so I'm still at square one.
The worse is if I'm with someone and the stranger is waiting politely for an introduction : ain't gonna happen since I don't know who you are. Playing this off is always a big test of my acting skills and my deodorant. Sometimes the deodorant loses.
I don't remember the names of a couple of people that I've have sex with. Messed up or just a little senility? I thinks it's pretty bad when I'm doing my head count (heh-heh on the pun) that I have to say, "that cute dude with the big 'fro from the Bronx" instead of "Marvin Atkins". I don't think I've had more partners than the average chick, so it's probably just a senility issue. I don't want to be a Ho' (did you know that it's really "whore" pronounced differently?) but if I am, I guess I just am.
I can name almost every teacher and professor I've ever had and most of my classmates from elementary school. (why this is something I'm proud of mystefies me).
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I finally watch the TV show "The Office" - I love it! I used to work there - they called it Bell South Call Center at the time.
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I've decided that I'm going to an afterwork party today - Why? I think I look cute today and don't want to waste all this fly girl. "A" doesn't get home from work 'til almost midnight so someone has to see me to appreciate it. Beer goggle compliments are always accepted here.
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I went downstairs and hung out with my smoke break friends today - they're all so funny and cool and I missed them since I was afraid that I would break down and smoke if I went outside during the day. The urge is just as strong, but I'm still hangin in there. Why are there all these recent reports on how tough it is to quit?
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A local radio show was discussing stupid songs. The discussion started after a caller asked the host to stop playing "Chicken Noodle Soup" calling it the dumbest song he ever heard. The host came back with "The DoubleDutch Bus" as the dumbest song ever and the caller conceded the point. What's the dumbest song played in regular rotation on the radio that you can remember?
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How does a team go from "Superbowl contenders" to "worst in the league" in one week? Ask some of these ATL fairweather Falcons fans. Damn! It was only one game.
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Love you "A".
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36 comments:
I am so proud of you Jali. Still not smoking? God bless. That is just excellent.
LOVE The Office. Love it.
Congratulations for remaining smoke free!! You should be really proud of yourself!
Take advantage of fly girl days. Even I have been known to leave my home on those days.
fair,
...but I'm grouchier than ever. Thanks for the support.
djn,
I may have to buy Season 1. I didn't know TV was this good.
mist,
Sounds like you know what I'm talking about.
I'M KILLING THE WORD VERIFICATION CRAP BECAUSE I HATE IT! WHERE'S MY GUN...
that Chicken Noodle Soup song is HORRID! My Humps is pretty retarded too, but it kinda grew on me after a while.
people who I don't remember come up and talk to me ALL the time. I feel like such a shit, but what can I say? I'm a potsmoker, and they're just gonna have to deal. :D
I do the whole fake "Yeah, how have you been? Its been so long!" while the entire time I a banging my brain against my skull trying to figure out just who in the heck the person is.
Noah's Arc is definitely my new favorite series. I have to go buy the DVD. And I have never heard of DoubleDutchBus so I feel blessed. I am coming to ATL for a Falcons game!!! My sis and her hub are season ticket holders.
Smooches! *still slurring*
The Office is the shit miss Jali. (lol@Bell South Call Center) And I've yet to hear this Chicken Noodle Song, but I wouldn't be surprised if it was a dumb song. Listen to the title.
As for dumbest song though, Double Dutch Bus is catchy and a bit silly and probably ranks up there, but then again there's Kung-Fu Fighting. Although I LOVE the song, it's got to be up in the top 10 list of dumbest songs. How about YMCA by the Village People? Tom's Diner with that ta-ta-ta-tatatata-ta-ta.. ah, you get the drift.
Hey, you're not alone in the "you've forgotten some of the names of folks you've had sex with"- I don't think its that many myself (well, I'm probably stretching the truth a little bit), but I've always been bad with names. Faces I do, names I forget.
I am the worst at remembering names! I can answer a call and before I've transferred it I've already forgotten who they are LOL. They love me around here..."D some guy is calling for you on line...uh...3" They can never prepare for a call.
I have to say that chicken noodle soup really is so stupid I can't believe anyone even bothered with it, but there was one other that drove me nuts and made me sound like my mother in the car (turn that sh*t off before I run us all into a tree!!!) That was that stupid milkshake song. Oh and one other something about My Neck- My Back
If you love the American version of The Office you should see the British one-Hilarious.
dawn,
Yup - My humps is pretty embarassing lyrically.
awaiting,
Can you imaging the two of us meeting? Bullshit to the nth degree.
kris,
Hope you have a ball! (Oh - enjoy the game too) - burp!
luke,
I forgot about Kung Fu Fighting (in fact, it was a little bit frightening). Thanks for making me feel a little more normal in the names department.
d,
I HATED "My Neck, My back" H-A-T-E-D it!
maria,
I want to see it - I think my all time fav British show is AbFab.
The Office is that joint...I am my offices Jim...a Pamless Jim.
I write a list of all the people I've had sex with every so often just to keep track.
When I can't remember names I use the following list:
Dude
Money
Ock
Son
Meng
Fam
you get the picture.
I remember Stephen King had a short story about aliens taking over the world and the only people that could see them were smokers who had tried to quit. I think it was called the 10:15 people.
I gotta put you on my blogroll just because you love The Office, and also because of your "forgetfulness" of men's names. Hope that's okay!
You rock Jali!
I hate that 'blank' holy shit what the hell is her name thing.
Dumbest song: Telephone Man
http://www.lyricsdownload.com/meri-wilson-telephone-man-lyrics.html
all i can say is thank god i do not remember the lyrics and only glanced to make sure it was the one.
"Lick my p*ssy and my crack"....that song???
That was my bar fly song.....back in da DAY!
Anything John Denver.
Honestly.
Have a great weekend!
An Angel Visits You
I am fucking hopeless with names too. I think i have a disposable memory. I only remember things for as long as i have to and then, ctl/alt/delete. GONE!
The person w/ you should introduce him- or herself, and the jerk you can't remember should respond in kind. You're not responsible!
(Disclaimer: I wasn't raised to be polite. My mom merely said to respect mothers and teachers.)
Dumbest songs: Bryan Adams's song w/ the trifling line "you can see your unborn children in her eyes," and the Celine Dion crap from Titanic.
Double Dutch Bus is NOT the dumbest song ever.
I will fight anyone who disses the Double Dutch Bus!
I don't even have any idea what in the hell the "Chicken Noodle Soup" song is...
Should I?
Is this something I should know?
Sigh...I can't keep up with you kids these days. ;)
Steve~
Great post...where to begin?
I too forget people's names. A lot. But not guys I've slept with. (Mostly because there have only been 2).
Congrats on not smoking! I am really proud of you.
THE OFFICE. As if I didn't already think you were cool enough, you love this show. Why aren't you a gay man? WHY?!?!?!?!
Dumbest song? "I've Never Been to Me" by Charlene. You remember that one:
Hey lady, you lady, cursing at your life
You're a discontented mother and a regimented wife...
Oh lord, just typing that makes me want to pull my ears off. And go break the 45 single that Mama Mancuso still has.
I've had that senility problem since I was in high school. When I joined the Army at 17 my recruiter thought I was really popular because he said almost anyone he talked to at my high school knew me and when he would tell me their names, I never had a clue who they were.
I can't watch the office because that guy is funny even when he's not doing anything. And the original office is all about the driest humor, which I prefer. Also sublime: Arrested Development and Canada's Trailer Park Boys.
hahaahha! Ah well, I guess if the NAME is what you remember most about the sex, it probably wasn't that good! ;)
I have often forgotten people's names when I have randomly bumped into them, but never the actual whole person! I am very close now to leaving my 20's though and fear that I now may take the extra jump to total memory loss - this is worrying.
As for British Comedy shows, look out for "The Day Today" and "Spaced"
For me, the anoying name stuff happens when people from my old restuarant come into the new one and say, "Remember me?" I remember faces, always. But names? Hell, I blank on friends' names, sometimes, when I am introducing them to someone (what's with that, anyway?).
So, I now make sure I am saying, as I reach out to shake hands, "Hi, Restaurant Gal. How's is going?" before the conversation gets too far along!
Yeah, aging sucks--except I have always been like this!
I have got into trouble for forgetting people so many times. The worst is when Linzi is with me and I have to make introductions to someone whose name I have no clue. Nightmare.
amadeo,
That list is a great idea! I can call everyone "honey".
never,
Thank you for adding me. I use to rock - now I kind of just bop.
m.a.t.,
I'm using Amadeo's idea - give people generic names.
laurie,
"country road - take me home..."
angel,
Thanks for the visit.
steph,
"ctrl - alt- delete" is a pretty good description of the way my mind handles information.
mac,
I tune that song out - well I try my best to tune it out. I really don't like "Screechie" from Canada.
rev,
How about the verse,
Hizzah, yizzah, dizzah...
C'mon - DUMB song. (jali runs for her life)
steven,
When you hear the chicken song - you'll know! "Chicken noodle soup, chicken noodle soup,chicken noodle soup with a soda on the side".
mr. fab,
I like blue.
dirk,
Maybe I'll be a gay man in my next life (If I'm good).
HATE "Never Been To Me". Imagine a hell where all they play are songs you hate...
c,
You really WERE popular - the whole school knew you.
mac, Never seen "Trailer Park Boys"
rhys,
You are my kind of chick!
t.l.f,
I'll look for both The Day Today" and "Spaced". Thanks for the tip.
restaurant gal,
You see hundreds of people daily and I'll best each of them sees themself as one of your close personal friends. I'm sure you handle it well.
kav,
I've resorted to the stupid, "introduce yourselves" which is so lame.
Fish Heads. '80s. Dumbest song ever.
Two thumbs up for kicking that habit still. Gum galore?
christina,
Gum like crazy! I love Eclipse peppermint and go through a pack a day... sounds like another habit.
I'm bad with names too but I'm so good at covering up and subtly asking them their name. My husband is bad bad bad at introducing me to anyone which I absolutely hate. I feel like I'm my daughter's nanny instead of her mom..standing there....all Filipino and going unrecognized by the big Caucasian man that is my husband......
remember "Disco Duck" that rick dees sang? Holy crap. I was way too young to remember but I saw it on VH1 the other day when they had that "I love the Seventies" series.
Currently if I hear that London Bridge Song by Fergie, I feel like stabbing my eardrum with a rusty antenna.
Point for point I have the same problem with remembering who the hell people are. It will keep me awake for days on end until I figure it out. I'm stealing "How is everyone?" That should get the prodding moving along. Thanks.
I remember the names of everyone I've had sex with. But maybe I'm not the average 'ho' (that's 2 apostrophes one for the w-h and one for the r-e). I certainly hope not, at least.
I can name most of my classmates from elementary school, but I have to be looking at a pic. Once I see them, i can tell you exactly where they sat, in each grade. (It's the same way I memorize my students now.)
The DoubleDutch Bus is an awesome song!!! Chicken Noodle Soup is a Bojangling embarassment. It is the dumbest song ever!
I'm having a fly girl day myself. Usually I will go home before I tutor on Mon and Wed and change into jeans and a t-shirt, but I look too cute to do it today.
I agree with Elaine about "London Bridge".
Hell, ANY song that involves Fergie.
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