Monday, June 26, 2006

Bigfoot Stuff

"A" has been discreetly watching certain parts of my anatomy.

I'd normally be pleased to know that the dude of my dreams has kept such a close eye on his chick, but the moment of revelation wasn't all that I had hoped for.

When we first got together, I was thrilled that we matched so well physically. He's just a little taller than me, so holding hands and other stuff is pretty comfortable.

Since we're close in size, our body parts are also individually close in size. I didn't give this much though but apparantly "A" did. (possibly inspired by the Nappy incident)

We were doing our Saturday relaxation thing, we were on the couch, and my feet were on his lap.

"You have grown man sized feet."

Never have six words shocked me more. (I have.... excuse me? Grow man sized feet? Wha...?)

To illustrate his point "A" snatched off his slippers, leaned back and started this foot to foot size comparison.

Just so you know, it's not possible to decrease one's foot size at a moment's notice. (people talk about the power of prayer - yada-yada)

I also lost the foot fight.

Grrrr.









17 comments:

heartinsanfrancisco said...

That's cold. Proportion is everything. Unless "A" has the mentality that inflicted foot-binding on women in ancient China, I think he's still feeling wounded about the Nappy lime green etc. incident. Which HE set in motion, after all. Or maybe he worries that he's not a big enough guy.

Listen, Girl. If he has to stoop to foot level to find some evidence that perhaps you're not perfect, either, you're doing well. Really.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

That's cold. Proportion is everything. Unless "A" has the mentality that inflicted bound feet on women in ancient China, I think he's still feeling wounded over the Nappy lime green etc. incident. Which HE brought about, I might add. Or maybe he worries that he's not a big enough guy.

Listen, Girl. If he has to stoop to foot level to find evidence that perhaps you're not perfect either, you're doing well. Really.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

Woops. Good old Safari screws me again. Please delete one of these duplicate comments. Sorry for the trouble. :<)

Rev. Smokin Steve said...

Hey... you criticize Nappy green outfit, he criticizes feet. I think it's a fair trade.

jali said...

Hey Hearts,

It was really funny at the time. I have a "Chris Rock" like dude and we find a lot in life to laugh at. Delete comments? I don't know how to do anything more complicated than posting.

Steve,

It is a fair trade and I did it (posted)so he'll see that I can take it as well as dish it.

hot coffee girl said...

Big feet means you have a very good understanding. Wa wa wa.

If it somes up again, tell him, "All the bigger to put up your ass." Foot up the ass is always a good threat, especially when they are grown man sized feet.

jali said...

HotCoffeeGirl,

Great threat with my grown man sized feet!

jennster said...

show him how the feet feel UP HIS ASS> LOL

SunKingpoet said...

No worries, big foot... we still got love for you....

Heh

Andy said...

Isn't it like death to tell a woman that she has [anything] like a man's?

heartinsanfrancisco said...

I was probably thinking of that great Eddie Murphy movie where he rejects a gorgeous woman because he peeks under the covers and doesn't like her feet. :>)

~d (tilde) said...

I SOOO would have been like: wanna see what this big ole steak can do, mother?!

The Blonde Menace said...

OMG that's kind of horrible, but in a really funny way!!!

I laugh, but of course I'm a little too close in size to my current love interest for my own comfort, I gained a lot of weight in my last year of college and have been having a hard time getting it back off, and just this past weekend he tried to lend me pjs but I refused b/c I was afraid I'd try them on and they wouldn't fit. Which is somewhat ridiculous b/c I'm not bigger than him or anything. Actually, I think I was also afraid that they would fit. Perfectly. I have very stupid girl issues.

I think I'd rather have the same size feet as him than wear the same size sweat pants. I don't know, it's a tough call.

~d (tilde) said...

Gurl...did you get your coffee mug? I got my thong-and let me tell you, baby...that thing wasnt on long, ya hear me?
OH and DAMN I wish I had photoshop!

jali said...

Jennster,
Lol!

SKP,
Everybody wants to be a comic these days... sad!

Andy,

Usually it would mean death, but I think he was paying me back.

Hearts,
I thought that girl was better than the Robin Givens character - feet and all.

Blond,

I know what you mean - I would never try on a guys clothing unless I KNEW it was waaaay too big for me. I've always been like that.

~D,

I'm drinking from my mug right now and looking at the big fat f**king head and enjoying my coffee. I'm glad your guy really appreciated the g-string (and the BFFH - laughing like crazy)

Anonymous said...

Don't worry about it. Your man is just jealous, because guys should have big feet, and he doesn't. He's just got foot envy.

jali said...

anonymous,

I like your thinking!