Blog of the Week Stuff

http://www.beautyandthebeer.com/


She'll shank you if you don't click the link.

I'm Back Stuff

I came back from vacation on Friday but didn't post since my boss made me do some actual work for most of the day. What a shocker after 8 days away.

I missed you guys! I've been going back and reading all the comments - Y'all are cool dudes!

I went to D.C. for my vacation to meet with my online family from a forum I belong to. We called it our first annual family reunion and despite the "annual" in the title, we've decided to do it again in October. (sounds like something I would belong too, huh?). I stayed with my buddy Lisa and had a ball! Actually we all stayed with my buddy Lisa - she offered once, and hotel reservations disappeared with the quickness. (we figured the $ we saved on hotels could be put to better use drinking and we were right!)

Washington DC is hotter than anywhere else on earth - I don't care what the temperature says - I don't care what the Weather Channel says - I don't care what your mamma says - D.C. boils. Boils.

Lisa has great A.C. and a BIG ass fan so we were comfortable while indoors. WE WERE NOT COMFORTABLE FOR ONE SECOND OUTSIDE DURING DAYTIME HOURS. (people kept hinting at hot flashes and hormonal changes in older women - the ingrates!)

Majority seems to rule in the nation's capital and my objections to outdoor movement while the sun was out was overruled. It's true that we did have a tentative agenda - I just expected the weather to be within normal range - not the 1st ring of Hell, surface of the Sun, oven on at 500 for the whole day, 3rd degree burn hot - when I agreed to the f***ing agenda. (yes, I'm still complaining you Hata's who were there).

We actually did the tourist thing and rode around looking at monuments. I was happy riding around and saying, "Oooh - Aah" at the appropriate times since the A.C. in Lisa's car works just fine. The others (damn them) wanted to walk up to each momument individually (I'm not that patriotic) to see them up close. Since Lisa insisted on turning off the car and taking her keys I was forced to join them since sitting in the car waiting for slow people with no A.C. in Washington, D.C. isn't an option.

I moved from shady spot to shady spot (hum the Mission Impossible theme and imagine me fast walking or running to get to some shade, then stopping to wipe the sweat from my delicate brow while making faces at my so-called buddies) while the group was strolling in the midday sun as though it were a lovely spring morning.

We took photos of a bunch of stuff that we won't care about ever again in life. We did take a couple of memorable photos outside the White House. One was the group holding a big slice of watermelon and grinning like crazy. The tourists from Europe thought it was hilarious and took pictures of us too. We enjoyed talking to them as well as the sole identified Republican guy in the crowd, (besides the Capital Cops who told me that their attack dog was a Republican too.)

The sole identified Republican guy in the crowd was really nice and had a pretty good sense of humor. (I'm guessing that the rest of the Republicans are sunning in the South of France on Haliburton profits.) He was the only person who raised his hand when I shouted for a Republican roll call so I came to my own conclusion.

I was planning on posting a link to photos, but since the film is still in the disposable cameras and the cameras are still in the bag I have yet to unpack it's gonna be a while.

I'm going to do some heavy blog reading now.

Vacation Stuff

I went to D.C. (couldn't find El Guapo, although I tried) and I'm still on vacation. Back on Friday.

Apology Stuff

This is an apology to the many I inconvenienced this morning. I may have made more than just a few of you late for work today. (You may use this post as your offical excuse)

I was the stalled car in the 3rd northbound lane on Interstate 85 just before the Buford Highway exit.

I've seen stalled cars in the past and driven past them thinking, "they should have done some maintenance before they got on the got-da%* highway this morning. Imagine holding all those people up." I've driven past them (finally) disgusted that they didn't pull over to the right side to await help.

It's not that simple. My car refused to move so as much as I wished to be a good car neighbor, it was beyond my capability.

A cool dude in an SUV stopped to help me. He held up his hand, stopped 2 lanes of traffic, spoke to the 2 lead drivers in those lanes, and pushed me to the side of the road. He drove off immediately, so I didn't even get his name.

I called the emergency (while in the fast lane) operator who connected me to the "HERO" group. (I have no idea what the acronym stands for)

The bright yellow HERO trucks come to the aid of stalled motorists in the Atlanta Metro area. I waited about an hour for my hero to arrive.

The guy was friendly and cool. I explained exactly what happened right before my car died and he started laughing.

I was hot, late for work and I had to use the bathroom. I didn't see anything funny about the situation.

He walked back to his truck, grabbed a container and returned, still smiling.

"Pop your gas lever.

"Now try it."

The car turned right over.

I was out of gas.

(my car "Guy" named because he's a stick eliminated some features he was bored with about a year ago. My speedometer, gas gauge, and milage gauge are forever frozen so I'm never sure how much gas I have or how far I've gone. Guy stopped recording milage at 309, 072 miles.)

Blog of The Week Stuff

This chick has to be read to be believed. http://www.miss-ann-thrope.com/

So....read.

Exam Stuff

Nothing of note has happened so I don't have a clever post to share.

Instead I'll ask see if you guys remember any of these popular products slogans:
Oh, keep your eyes on your own papers! (the standard pre-exam drill) The winner gets to say "I'm The Winner!"

Name That Product! Based on the clue given identify the product.
1. Underwear That's Fun to Wear.
2. I can't believe I ate the whole thing.
3. Where's the beef?
4. Don't cook tonight, call__________.
5. You knocked my block off!
6.It takes a licking and keeps on ticking.
7. Put a tiger in your tank.
8.Hold the pickles, hold the lettuce, special orders don't upset us!
9.Wouldn't you really rather have a ____________?
10.Does she or doesn't she?
11. A little dab'll do ya.
12.Hand picked by Juan Valdez.
13.Come to where the flavor is.
14.We try harder.
15.We answer to a higher authority.
16.When it rains, it pours.

True to form, I'm stopping on an odd number because I'm not that excited by this entry. Maybe something interesting will happen at lunch...

Tight Stuff

I usually parade around my office and eventually the building I work in, so that the cute outfit I've chosen for the day can be admired by many (and hopefully envied by that chick on the 5th floor that I just don't like for no real reason - she just looks snooty to me).

Today I will make other plans.

I woke up at 6:40 this morning - well got up at 6:40 after hitting the snooze button repeatedly. 6:00 is my regular get up and go time so the 40 minute difference is a really big deal. Really.

I was so late that I stopped for a moment to consider skipping my shower to save a little time. Since the temp outside right now is near 90, I'm sure that would have been a really poor choice. My co-workers would be eternally grateful if they knew what my decision might have cost them.

Since I had to shower, I needed to find a way to save time.

Insta-clothes!

Insta-clothes are the garments in my wardrobe that never need ironing and go pretty well with almost anything. Insta-clothes have saved me from the horror of being late on more than one occasion so at 7:08 I grabbed Insta- slacks and an Insta-shirt to match the sparkly shoes I'd decided to wear today. I tip-toed out of the bedroom and quietly shut the door.

My guy "A" goes into work in the afternoons so I try to be as quiet as possible in the morning and I usually dress in the living room to let him rest.

The black slacks are insta-clothes because they're skin tight. Skin tight. I''m usually not the hoochie at the office so understand that the shirt I chose was supposed to cover the skin tight thing. I cleverly had it all worked out and after applying my work face in the bathroom mirror above the sink I grabbed my keys, jumped in my car and made it to my building a full 1/2 hour before my start time.

I had this lovely mental image of my appearance that didn't quite match the reflection myself on the side of the building. "Distortion", I told myself., 'you're fine".

The elevators in my building have mirrored doors.

Jali in the mirror. No distortion.

Hootchie - OMG - I'm a hootchie at the workplace.

The shirt that was supposed to make it all come together was not the shirt I was wearing. I was wearing an 'emphasize her big ass shirt.'

R. Kelly was stuck in the closet.

I'm stuck at my desk... (I have to pee)

Creative Stuff

I've got that wonderful "clothesline fresh" feeling today. My teeth are sparkling like the Orbit gum commercial (the sound effects from the commercial are awesome "ding!") and my skin is all aglow. I've been singing in tune all morning ( a minor miracle) and I've been walking on sunshine. (amazing that I was able to fit that many tv commercial phrases into one short paragraph, huh?)

What's got me in such a great mood? (despite my determination last night to break my "no drink on a Monday night" rule with vast amounts of Bombay and tonic to shore up the nerves and the resulting sluggish "morning after Jali")

I read a poem at an open mic affair in Riverdale, GA last night and the crowd showed me love. Art for the sake of art is all well and good, but positive feedback is a miraculous thing.

I hung out with some of the other performers until waaay after midnight (thus breaking my "early to bed on a Monday night" rule) and we laughed and played games like a crew of old friends. In a sense I suppose we were - going through the same thing at the same time brings people together.

I even planned next week's performance with one of my new close personal friends (whattup Adam!!!). We've decided to try an improv type piece - we're going to ask the audience to shout out different topics and we're going to perform based on the topic. It will be challenging, but in my "Newbie" ignorance I believe I can do it. (you can do eeeeet.... you can do eeeet aaallll niiiiight long! - movie line)

I made some great contacts too. I've written quite a few songs and a brother offered to collaborate with me just based on the lyrics I croaked out on the patio between puffs of my menthol ciggie. Either he was a bit drunk, or I'm really a multitalented chick just waiting for that big break. (I'm clicking these heels three times and believing in the dream)

(lunch break)

(back 1:03pm) lunch report: called "A" to whine about my sluggishness - the man has some wonderful wide shoulders to lean on and cry on. He was real cool at listening to my nonsense while trying to dress for work especially since he was wide awake when I stumbled in grinning in triumph from my fun evening of spoken word and liquor. I have a wonderful man y'all (well I live down south now so I get to use the language).

Had a "Jason's Deli" chicken salad sandwich from a lunch presentation in our office (free food is always yummy) and did 1/2 of the crossword puzzle (Tuesdays are easy as hell) after reading part of the local newspaper. I'm sure you're thinking, "what an exciting life she leads".

Back to the pre-lunch story...

I'm making a conscious effort to retake my artistic self. Poetry and songwriting are in me. My unfinished novel, "Granny" is in me too.

"A" has encouraged me to pursue the writing thing - to finish the novel - to speak the poetry - to actually 'walk the walk' and in yet another pinky bet http://jali-jalishouse.blogspot.com/2006/06/pinky-bet-stuff.html, we agreed to work on our creative sides. "A" is a very talented writer so support from him is a really a very big deal to me.

Feels good to have the juices flowing! (read into that what you wish cause whatever you're thinking is true!)

Hip Stuff

Very upset woman here. Some truths are just too difficult to face voluntarily and when the truths sink in (as they eventually do) upset is usually the result. I'm not crying anymore, but the feeling of terrible loss has stayed with me since I realized what I'm missing.

I thought I still had it. I thought it would be with me forever but I somehow lost it. I lost it. Me...sigh.

When did I lose my "hip"?

There was a time when my hipness wasn't in question. You could just look at me and see the hipness radiating from me. I spoke the language and sang the songs. I knew all the right moves and hung out at the hippest spots. I was one of the "cool kids" and I became a cool adult.

My wardrobe reflected my cool. My hair and nails, my walk and talk. All hip to the nth degree. I decided to stop smoking weed in college and my girls followed suit. I'd wear my hair a certain way and others would rock my style. I was hip.

I thought about the four most important people in my life and wondered if their appearance had anything to do with the loss of my hipness. Nope.

I was a hip mom - the Kool Ade mom of the block - the one the kids could talk too. Having children didn't negate my hipness - if anything my little ones became fashion and social accessories to add to the Jali mystique.

I began to question my hipness recently while driving. A song came on the radio and I didn't understand what the hell the song was about although I thought I did. I wondered, 'why would the guy snap rubberbands at a chick at a strip club'. I happened to have wondered out loud (big mistake) and "A" started laughing at me (first sign of loss of hip - folks laughing at you). He explained that 'popping a rubber band' had to do with spending a lot of cash at the club - not literally popping a rubberband on some woman's butt.

Oh.

The hip Jali would have known that. This new somewhat hip neutral person is confused by certain phrases. I don't like this.

Unfair Stuff

I've been looking through the different blog pages I regularly visit and I've been getting pissed. Yes folks, pissed. Pissed at the various authors of said pages since I am obviously not being entertained when there are no new posts. Page after page of stuff I've seen before - NO UPDATES. "C'mon people," I thought to myself. "Let's get to work!"

Then it hit me.

I haven't posted since Monday and the post before that was about a week ago. Who the hell am I to get pissed at everyone else in Blogland for doing pretty much what I do?

There's the rub - I'm a "do as I say, not as I do" person sometimes and I have standards that I expect others to uphold. I give myself a pass since I understand what sweet Jali is going through. (did you all know that God is cool with me too - I expect an 'A' for effort in the end - good intentions and all that)

Here are a few of my faults that I will acknowledge here:

I look at drivers who try to pass me on the highway as reckless assholes but I'm willing to speed like crazy at times ("I'm an excellent driver... an excellent driver" it's a name that film moment).

I'll hold up the grocery line to get my .45 cents off using my coupons, but get pissed off if someone in front of me does the same thing. (I know it doesn't make sense)

I'll offer to pay for the first dinner but will never go out with you again and consider you a cheap bastard if you let me pay on a first date.

I said "a few" so that's it for now.



Totally unrelated thought: "A", you're the greatest!

Family Stuff

I drove to Delaware from Georgia on Thursday after work, then back to Georgia again on Saturday night. The drive took about 12 hours each way. (Yes, I still went skating last night)

My uncle Roger died last week and his funeral was on Friday morning. Relatives came in from all over the country to say goodbye and I could do no less. (yes, that was me flying past you on I95 at 4 in the morning)

Uncle Roger was known in our family for two things: his thriftiness and his sense of humor.

I'm unable to discuss my uncle's thriftiness here - I don't wish to get in trouble with my family.

A few years back, my Auntie Ro had to have a toe amputated. Uncle Roger went out and bought her some socks made with individual toes. He cut off the sock toe to correspond with her amputation. The rest of us were handling the toe situation delicately and his joke was exactly what my auntie needed at the time. He made us laugh whether we wanted to or not.

We laughed a lot in Delaware after the funeral. Old stories were retold, old tricks played on each other, old wounds opened and rehealed, and new bonds forged. We were able to get to know each other again for a few hours.

We made the same promise that we always do after a funeral: "we've got to get together again soon. We can't wait for someone to pass away."

I hope we keep the promise this time.

Bigfoot Stuff

"A" has been discreetly watching certain parts of my anatomy.

I'd normally be pleased to know that the dude of my dreams has kept such a close eye on his chick, but the moment of revelation wasn't all that I had hoped for.

When we first got together, I was thrilled that we matched so well physically. He's just a little taller than me, so holding hands and other stuff is pretty comfortable.

Since we're close in size, our body parts are also individually close in size. I didn't give this much though but apparantly "A" did. (possibly inspired by the Nappy incident)

We were doing our Saturday relaxation thing, we were on the couch, and my feet were on his lap.

"You have grown man sized feet."

Never have six words shocked me more. (I have.... excuse me? Grow man sized feet? Wha...?)

To illustrate his point "A" snatched off his slippers, leaned back and started this foot to foot size comparison.

Just so you know, it's not possible to decrease one's foot size at a moment's notice. (people talk about the power of prayer - yada-yada)

I also lost the foot fight.

Grrrr.

Blog of The Week Stuff

Steph is, well... Steph. You'll see...

GO READ THIS BLOG! http://muchadoaboutsumthin.blogspot.com/

Language Stuff

Ad infinitum. Que pasa. Soupe du jour.

These phrases originated as Latin, Spanish and French. They are part of the average Joe's normal everyday vocabulary. Yanno - the average Joe speaking English. The language that "everyone" here should speak according to some.

hint: We don't actually speak English here in the USA - we speak a patois - a bastardized version of the language of the country we fought and defeated in the Revolutionary War.

Los Angeles. ("the angels" in Spanish)
New Mexico. (named after... you know that really large country south of us - we just don't want actual Mexicans living there )
Des Moines. ("monks" in French)

Those 'English only' proponants need to consider the renaming of many quite large and highly populated metro areas since they wish to abolish the use of other languages in "America" (the misnomer they call the US when sounding extra patriotic [cue background music] although North America includes other countries that we don't count when normally saying 'America' because we're overly U.S.-centric and basically ignorant as a people).

If the "English only" proponants are serious then there's a lot of work ahead of them. We need to correct our spelling in dictionaries and encyclopedias. Colour, for example is the English way to spell the word we spell as color. Better get rid of the foreign phrases we use everyday and we'd better rename all the states and capitals of non-British origin. California can become Cornwall. Arizona can become Ascot.

Makes as much sense to me as an "English only" does to be served in a cheesesteak restaurant in Philadelphia.

Lime Green Gear Stuff

The cutie pie that I'm dating can rest assured that I truly care about him. The reason that he can feel totally confident in my genuine feeling is that I spent the entire morning with him in the Atlanta area one Saturday despite his outfit.

You may wonder, "what in the world could the man have worn to make Jali say all this on the internet." Well I'll share: He wore a lime green "Nappy" track suit... with emerald green and black racing stripes... with the name "Nappy" in bold white letters on the back. (I made a serious effort to research the "Nappy" apparel company, but was unable to find an active link.

I really wanted to share the look with you guys so that you'd really understand how much I care for this man. Remember, it was lime green. With emerald green and black racing stripes. Nappy.) Based on the one example of the design of the "Nappy" people that I've seen, I assume that the company is out of business. They really need to be.

The plan in the morning was to run out briefly to make it to an early morning doctor's appointment. "A" didn't really care what the doctor thought about his outfit. "A" should have cared.

When he got in the car, I sort of shielded my eyes from the glare of the lime green. He gave me that look and I didn't say a word. Not one word until we were on the road.

Now let me explain, "A" is a beautiful man. Just beautiful... but remember the saying, 'beauty is as beauty does'? Well "A" decided to do the Nappy lime green track suit that morning.

I offered to play a road game to make things fun. "Let's name all the green things we see while we're traveling." My suggestion wasn't even given a response.

"Oooh... there's your car!" Yup, a guy was driving a shiny lime green convertable so I sped up a bit to get a good look. "A" refused to acknowledge the car at all.

"Green trees, green grass, green trash can..." I was on a roll playing my game. "A" wasn't amused, but I find my entertainment where I can.

We pulled into the parking garage of the medical complex, and I decided to wait outside and read for a while. "Don't worry baby, I'll see you as soon as you come out of the building." "A" didn't get the joke.

After the appointment the original plan was to fly back home, change into more groovy gear and find some fun or trouble to get into. My stomach wasn't having it.

I went into whiney mode. "I'm hungry, I'm hot... I have a headache." I accompanied this much repeated refrain with my patented 'pitiful Jali' look. After about my 12th or 13th sigh and his obvious annoyance at my whining, "A" finally relented and agreed to feed me.

Did we stop at the closest fast food spot where we could whizz through the drive-thru?
Ha-Ha.

I sped onto the highway with a goal in mind: The Famouse Pancake House in Stone Mountain.
The restaurant was crowded (as always). TFPH is my favorite breakfast spot in the Metro area and I was excited to share the experience with the dude of my dreams.

The dude of my dreams still wore the lime green Nappy suit with emerald and black racing stripes. He remembered his outfit as we walked past the people sitting outside the restaurant. (see, this is why I need a camera phone - the look on his face when the realization set in was amazing).

I grabbed his hand to show solidarity, but turned away so that he wouldn't see me giggling.
The hostess sat us near the middle of the room. "A" was cool - well I suppose as cool as one can be while wearing a lime green Nappy track suit with emerald and black racing stripes and with every eye in the restaurant watching his every move.

We ordered, the food was delicious, the conversation great and the time had come to make our grand exit.

"When I get home, I'm going to put this suit in a bag and pee on it". (Yeah, yeah, but you still have it on now.)

I proudly held his hand again as we weaved through the crowded room of staring people. "He's MY man!" (yeah, that was a paraphrased quote by "Squeek" from The Color Purple).

As we drove home I notice the engine temp gauge was slowly edging towards dangerous. "A" wisely suggested that we stop at the auto parts store for fluids. (Ooh goodie, another adventure.)

I make the most of each and every shopping opportunity and was cruising the aisles for things I might need, and I suppose that "A" got tired of waiting in the hot car. I looked up and he was standing next to me, sweating like crazy in his lime green track suit with emerald and black racing stripes.

I put down the thing-a-ma-bob that I had been examining and followed "A" to the register. The guy that helped us happened to mention that it was his B-day and that he couldn't wait until he got off.

"Um sir.. may I ask you a serious question?"
"Sure", he was a polite young man.
"If someone gave you a lime green Nappy track suit with emerald and black racing stripes as a gift for your birthday, would you wear it?"

Post script - "A" is finally speaking to me again. Would I do it all over knowing what I know now? Hells yeah! That was the best laugh I'd had for days and the other customers and clerks enjoyed it too.
If anyone can find a photo of a "Nappy" track suit, please send me a link!!

Sports Stuff (heartbreak and happiness)

My immaturity level has reached a new high (or low) due to professional sports. Basketball is the culprit and I'm whining.

I spent a good part of my day yesterday sulking. - I was pissed that I lost sleep staying up past my worknight bedtime to watch that Duane Wade dude (hmmmph) mess up my Mavs in the last seconds (more than freakin' once - I'm including OT) of the game. I'm a bad winner (as I've discussed) but I'm a horrible loser. I really get angry. Really.

When the Mavericks were leading the series 2-0 I talked much smack here at work - all the delivery guys, the messengers, our caterers, the staff here, our vendors - even our clients - everybody within hearing range got to hear me talk about the sweep. Yeah... the sweep.

Many of those people stopped in yesterday to laugh at me. (how rude!) I tried my best to maintain a professional demeanor while listening to amateur (boring!) recaps of the final plays in regulation and the overtime moves Miami made. I saw the game. I remember what happened and didn't need the Jr. Aspiring Sportscaster League to recap anything, but recap they did. All. Day. Long.

My daughter, the comedienne Brooke, sends me text messages of the score - as though she feels as though I'm unable to comprehend what I actually saw, the ESPN recaps, the internet ad infinitum articles, or the sports pages in the local newspapers. (advice - don't bet with your children - if they win they will harrass you to death)

Let's see what Avery and the boys do tonight.

My only consolation right now (BRAGGING SECTION) is that I have tickets to the opening pre- season game, The Falcons vs The Patriots. The game is on August 11th and I'll start my therapy soon to learn to cope with the nosebleeds I'm anticipating from sitting thousands of feet above sea level in the only seats my slim budget would allow right now. I don't care - I'LL BE AT THE OPENING GAME!!!!!

I bought the tickets online a couple of weeks ago for $24 each - c'mon, not bad at all. Of course there's a slight service charge, but I'm going to a pro game with a beautiful man for under 100 bucks. Maybe I need to stop sulking.

Random Stuff

Buzzwords. The rampant use is annoying as hell.

Have you ever listen to a speaker drone on for 20 minutes and wondered, "what the hell is he talking about?" Some folks are unable to speak without using certain popular phrases or words. Some people feel that the insertion of these words make the speaker seem more informed.

The words in parenthesis are what I think when I hear these overused lines.

Synergy. (I can't really express what I need to say...hmmmm "synergy" sounds good. I'll say it.)
Leverage. (When does this concept fit into a staff meeting?)
Issues. (my serious pet peeve - almost everything can be termed an issue - just sounds stupid to me)
Thinking outside the box. (C'mon - we're operating inside the corporate box - it's just something that people say but don't really mean.)
X Factor. (Duh)
Win-Win. (Oh, please...)

Please stop the madness! Let's have meetings and conversations without using ANY OF THESE WORDS OR PHRASES. Please.

Science Stuff

I listen to 107.9, The A Team radio show in Atlanta every morning during my drive to work. This morning the audience poll had to do with childhood science experiments and callers shared their stories. Todays topic was a direct result of the video experiment using diet soda and menthos candy. http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=4077724936497803978.

One guy called to say that during a particularly boring summer day, despite the many warnings from his mom, he decided to mix bleach and ammonia in a jar, covered it for a while, then removed the top. He said he lost the sense of taste for a couple of months and his eyes were streaked with red. I'll bet his butt was streaked with red too once his mother found out.

Another caller used ketchup on pennies to clean them - she said that it takes 2 minutes to get the job done. (I just might try this myself today if I can fit it into my busy and oh so interesting schedule - no smart remarks please). I wanted to hear more stories and sat in the car for a few minutes after I parked, but my time was short so up to my floor I rode still thinking about the show.

Did any of you watch "Mr. Wizard" or "Bill Nye, The Science Guy" on TV?

My memory isn't the best so I did a little research (code for googled "Mr. Wizard') and found a page where a few of the experiments are listed:

Lykopodium powder was sprinkled on water to break the surface tension and a kid reach his hand into the tank. Amazingly, the kid pulled his hand out and it was completely dry.

Mr. Wizard had a kid press his arms against a doorway for about 30 seconds and then after the kid relaxed, his arms flew right back up.

A girl learned that her hands could not tell the difference between hot and cold after being exposed to the opposite temperature.

Tie a piece of wet string to a faucet and make the water flow sideways by moving the string.

I did further research (googled Bill Nye) and his website http://www.billnye.com/ is pretty interesting.

A little taste of my childhood curiosity has come back. Experiments were fun to me at one time and I'll do the ketchup-penny test today to see how it feels.

Anybody want to play? Do an easy experiment and let me know the result. I double dog dare you.

Move Stuff

Just learned that the apartment I've been waiting for is available and I will be able to move on Saturday. Yup, this Saturday! I'm sure that you all know how lazy I am - so you'll understand my reluctant joy.

The joy: I want to move. I need to move. The police have been driving through my complex with an alarming regularity lately, and it's not at all comfortable for me (no I'm not a criminal on the run - I just don't like it). The new place will cost a lot less than my current spot and offers much more. There's an added bonus that I'll discuss another day since it deserves it's own post.

The reluctant part: The lazy part of me doesn't feel like packing up crap, hauling same crap to truck, unloading crap at new spot and unpacking and putting away crap. I almost want to abandon what I have and just have new crap delivered. (a fantasy since I can't afford the crap I already have and it'll be a long time before my budget allows for new)

Now some of you may not realize just how hot it can get in Georgia. Asking friends to help is asking a lot. A whole lot. Of course the sweetness in my life will help, but he's just one man, so that still leaves half of the work to me.

("scheme-scheme-plot - plot" - ever since Luda used the line, I've been itching to copy him)

How can I make the offer of helping me to move in the relentless Georgia sun sound like fun so that I only need to move the girlie stuff and the big strong men I know can do their big strong thing?

One word. Brew.

Something about the offer of an icy cold foamy beverage makes the average guy I know willing to do almost anything if that beverage is the prize. My buddies can afford (fill in expensive beverage name - I'm not that hip - what the hell is Grey Goose?) if they're in the mood, but the offer of free beer is irresistable for some reason. Possible conditioning from childhood? Beer - good. Beer - good. Beer - good.

Whatever works.

I'll be back with an update.

Link Stuff

Since I can't get my links to show up on my page, I've decided to do this the Jali way. I'm not renting my blog. (I really don't understand the concept)

Blog of the Week: http://steveskalish.blogspot.com/ - title: My Big Fat F'kin Head. The name of the blog is what made me look the first time. His writing is what made me keep coming back.

C'mon, do yourself a big favor and check out Smokin' Steve. Take some time and read through the archives. For a guy from Pennsylvania (I do not love that state) he's pretty cool. N0 - he's very cool.